Skip to content Admissions Search for:. The Universality of Denial Denial is universal. Begin Your Recovery Journey Today Email Us. The Possibility of Intervention and the Removal of Shame There is a common myth in the recovery community that addicts have to hit rock bottom before they seek treatment. What to Say to an Addict in Denial If breaking through pathological denial is not the primary project of intervention, what is?
According to SAMHSA: From this perspective, constructive or therapeutic confrontation is useful in assisting [addicts] to identify and reconnect with their personal goals, to recognize discrepancies between current behavior and desired ideals, and to resolve ambivalence about making positive changes.
Be Specific : Talk about specific behaviors, situations, and incidents that demonstrate the impact of their addiction in order to help them see how their substance use is negatively affecting them and the people they love. This does not mean making a laundry list of complaints but rather is an opportunity to show how their drug use is keeping them from their true desires. Avoid Shame or Blame : Addiction is a chronic brain disease, not a character flaw, and it cannot be cured by shaming or blaming your loved one.
Ask What They Want : No one dreams of being an addict, but in the midst of addiction it can be difficult to remember the dreams you once had. By asking your loved one what they want out of life, you can help them reconnect to their goals and explore how continued substance use interferes with those goals. This can incentivize recovery and provide newfound motivation for change. Talk About Their Fears : Admitting addiction can be scary, but talking through those fears with your loved one can give them the opportunity to examine them with greater clarity, often helping them identify their irrationality or find strategies for overcoming them.
Offer Support : Tell your family member that you love them and are there for them. Ask them what they need in order to help them overcome addiction. We're Here to Help. Call Today! We're Here to Help Learn More.
The Right Treatment Program For Your Family It is essential that the addiction treatment program you choose also works from a compassionate, medical understanding of addiction in order to foster motivational change rather than spark defensive reactions.
Previous Next. Related Blogs. October 18, September 20, Call Us Today! Learn More. Get Help Now. One cannot come to believe something new in the innermost self by simply willing it to happen. That would be like planting a seed in the ground on Monday and expecting to have an apple tree on Friday.
Once the seed has been planted, it needs time to root. It also needs proper nourishment for growth and maturity. This is the same way someone comes to accept being chemically dependent.
The seed is planted in the innermost self of the person who admits that they have the problem by their own words. Once planted it is nourished by the continuation of the same process, admitting, Step One of the AA program. We admitted. Stage two denial is when a person denies the need for ongoing sobriety support after treatment is completed.
It represents denial of being powerless. It is important to understand that good intentions in treatment do not guarantee program action after discharge. Once out from under the influence of the peer group in treatment, sonic people will go their own way.
They will never attend a single support meeting in their home community, unless they have a profound change in their inner perception of both the problem and its corresponding solution. This is sometimes called a spiritual awakening, or a moment of clarity.
Good intentions are not enough. The absence of this inner perception keeps the person in the second stage of denial. This problem has to be corrected in the innermost self before arty long-term sobriety can be obtained. The real change takes place in the spirit innermost self , not in the mind understanding.
This is why many people see the recovery process as spiritual not psychological. It takes place in the Heart not the Head. Overcoming the second stage of denial requires the successful transference of dependency from self to a greater power outside of self for the maintaining of ongoing sobriety.
Many people have painfully discovered this, having relapsed after years of continuous sobriety. The persistence of this denial is astonishing in many who continue to attempt abstinence by themselves in spite of repeated failure. It seems that they are incapable of grasping lie notion that they are NOT all powerful. This illusion of power is a major barrier to recovery from chemical dependency.
Overcoming the second stage of denial requires the successful elimination of this illusion. This is not just an ordinary illusion. The second stage of denial is easily broken by the transference of dependency from self to the sobriety support fellowship.
When a person gets exposure to the Step program for instance, they initially do it with a great deal of reluctance. What they usually find before too long is that something very powerful is happening to them. Externally, emotions are charged with positive energy. A feeling of belonging begins to replace the old feelings of guilt and worthlessness.
Acceptance is now gradually replacing compliance. Remember, this is a process that is taking place in spite of early resistance, not an event that happens as a result of a decision. Miraculously as a result of exposure, an internal, unseen transference of dependency is taking place in the innermost self.
This new found power seen as the fellowship is now taking the place of the illusion of power that used to dominate the person with so many empty promises. The internal development of Ibis transference of dependency from self in the support fellowship takes time. Stage three denial is the denial of the need to he willing to go to any length in the recovery process.
It is an indicator that you have other priorities that are just as or more important than the maintenance of sobriety. The commitment to sobriety may be strong. You would never attempt to treat any other medical condition by yourself, please do not start with addiction.
Moving a substance user through the stages of change is best accomplished with professional guidance. Talking alone to your loved one often produces little to no effect.
In order for a person to consider change and engage in change talk, they have to see the benefits of change are greater than the consequences of staying the same.
For many addicts, they see treatment as a negative or a consequence in that they will somehow give up their illusion of control. When a family engages with a professional interventionist that is able to work with both the substance user and the family it increases the likelihood the substance user will see a need to do something different and effective.
The next steps are to stop thinking or believing you will make your loved one do something different simply because you feel you had a productive talk. At Family First Intervention, we recognize that not all intervention programs are designed or created equal.
There are many wonderful interventionists who will come out and talk to your loved one. How many actually support the family after the intervention when the real trials and tribulations will occur.
The answer is, not many. Most interventionists treat an intervention as a rehearsal and 12 Step call in an attempt to talk your loved one into accepting treatment. Addiction affects the family and just about anyone else the substance user comes into contact with. Addressing only the substance use addresses only a small part of the problem.
We know that not every family that calls will be ready to move forward. We also know that not every family member will be on the same page nor will they be ready to hear that they would greatly benefit from changing themselves. One of their many goals should be moving your family into their own recovery and reducing your reactivity to the substance user.
Families that are not ready to address their part will still benefit from starting the intervention process if they were to keep an open mind about addressing behaviors they can change.
Skip to main content. Search this website. How to Talk to an Addict in Denial July 30, Below are a few examples of denial: They are resentful of many people, places, and things. Believing help is not needed and when help is needed the addict or alcoholic believes they can solve the problem themselves and does not need treatment.
All their problems are the result of everyone and everything other than themselves.
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